When 2011 began, I weighed a staggering 240 lbs. Yes, horrible, I know. But over the last year, I've lost about 43 lbs. This is nothing new for me. Don't get me wrong, everytime I gain weight my highest number gets even higher and it takes longer to get it back off. If you looked at a chart of my weight over the past 20 years, it would look like one of those paper scrolls that shoots out of the machine which moniters someone's heart rate - lots of peaks and valleys. I'm hoping this last time will stick for good. Thanks to an invaluable program (which I will be glad to give you the name of if you email me) I'm learning new habits, not just dieting. And it helps that I'm exercising fairly regularly, too. I'm not blind to the fact that I was not making the healthiest of choices.
Of course, I also know that I'll never be a juniors size 5 like my sister. My body doesn't work that way. About ten years ago, I lost from 230 down to about 150, which was REALLY good for me. But maintaining it took way more effort than I was willing to give. I was eating only three very small meals everyday that consisted mostly of lettuce and working out three hours a day. I finally asked myself if I was happy. The answer was a resounding no.
How was I supposed to enjoy my new body if all I did was eat lettuce and exercise? Any time I had outside of work I spent working out. I was absolutely miserable. I wanted real food, like chicken. It didn't even have to be fried, I'd settle for grilled. The problem was anytime I ate what, for most people, was an average meal I would gain weight. I gained weight eating 3 oz of grilled chicken. HUH?
Several years later, I had a friend politely tell me that fat people were fat because they didn't put any effort into it. I wanted to slap him. He weighed like 95 lbs and ate like a horse. "It's simple," he said. "Just don't over-eat." Right. Cause every body is the same. Not.
I've learned that my body doesn't work like everyone else's. My goal now has very little to do with weight. The numbers I care about are on my medical charts. As long as I can maintain those numbers and live a normal life, then I'm happy. Anything more is just a perk.
